March 01, 2008

Story of this pendant

For my birthday last year, I bought myself a birthday gift. A pendant that I have seen much earlier and have been thinking about getting but was held back by the price (tho it's less than 30 bucks). The very pendant that I'm wearing around my neck now, by default. Unless I'm wearing something that requires more accessorizing than a simple silver piece.

It's a cubic cage. Inside the cage are three supposingly Swarovski crystals - 2 white and 1 pink. I don't think they are really the luxury brand crystal cos they don't shine much as they should. Nevertheless, the first time I saw this pendant, it was a love affair.

It charmed me cos it gave me a sense of entrapment, yet a sense of being safe. At that point in time, I did feel trapped in time, in the wake of a lost relationship, lost love. On the other hand, the three crystals inside were so pretty. They move about when you shake the pendant a bit. There is some kind of irony in this. Like caged freedom. Some kind of randomness in a tiny, rigid space. Some kind of beauty that's being protected in a cube, away from any ugly contact with the outside.

I felt the crystals could have easily represent Me, Myself and I. And honestly, I use it to remind me to protect myself from the pretense of this world, the illusion of being understood ever, and the pits of being in love again.

Yes, yes. I know it sounds pessimistic and doomed and whatnot. But hey, that's my way, my idea of coping and in a way, moving on. So, cut me some slack.

I toy with images, concepts of entrapment, illusions-turned-disillusions and a growing belief that nothing much in life is very much real. People change all the time; things are on constant shifting; relationships can be fleeting and meaningless; our understanding of any one thing does not even withstand the flow of time. What's there to hold onto?

haha... Ok, fine. I'd stop. Here. But really, amid all these that I know I can't hold onto, I live moment by moment. That, honestly, is more incredible. No?

Posted by 杏 cy （Jancy） at 02:30